How Can I not Cry today?

Having to travel today distracted me. I could watch the TV from a distance – literally and figuratively – while I walked through security and boarded my flight.

But I had a layover. I tried to do emails and distract myself in other ways while murmuring simple prayers for these families in CT. I had to stop and sit.

I grieve for and with the parents who said goodbye for the last time at the bus stop; who sang their last lullaby last night; who ruffled the hair one last time; who gave a final kiss on a forehead…

It made me think of those parents around the world who did the same thing yesterday. Who didn’t know a marketplace bomb would shatter their world; who didn’t expect a trip to the water pump would result in a kidnapping; who will never see their children again.

Last night as colleagues and I drove to dinner we talked about pastoring amidst crisis and tragedy, and then we turned on the news today.

I sit in this airport lounge and wonder how can I not grieve and cry in the midst of the pain in this world. I am beyond trying to understand and explain why this happens… It reminds me of this book I’m reading in which a Jewish child who survives WWII in Europe continually asks people close to her, “Is there a plan in all of this?” She asks other questions, which people ask in times of tragedy.

Seeking solace ad prayer through music I stumbled across this song by Güngör. It speaks of pain and redemption. I don’t think it is perfect, and I don’t want people to think they need to rush through pain to redemption. However, it points to hope, and it reminds me that death and tragedy are never the ends of the story.

In short, this song helped me to pray, as did a prayer I heard a few weeks ago: “the pain may not have an end at this time, yet it will have an end in time.”

Here is a link to watch the song on youtube:
Beautiful Things by Güngör

Here are the lyrics:
With all this pain
I wonder if I’ll ever find my way
I wonder if my life could really change at all
All this earth
Could all that is lost ever be found
Could a garden come up from this ground at all

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

All around
Hope is springing up from this old ground
Out of chaos life is being found in You

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

You make me new, You are making me new
You make me new, You are making me new
You are making me new

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

You make me new, You are making me new
You make me new, You are making me new

Advertisements

Leave a comment

Filed under everyday life, prayer

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s